An Anniversary

October 6th marked four "official" years that I have been diagnosed (10/6/2010) with Parkinson's disease. When I look back at the symptoms, this is probably year five of the disease.  I think this is a good time to take stock at what has changed and what hasn't.

What has changed?

• My symptoms: I used to have significant right arm tremor. That has actually dissipated but in place of that has emerged rigidity and irregular gait (when I'm off).  When the drugs are working, you probably cannot tell that I have PD. I also feel the disease creeping very slowly into my left hand.

• Typing and Texting: both have suffered as my hands and fingers get stiff.  As mentioned previously, the use of Dragon Naturally Speaking helps typing tremendously. Oddly enough, my sexting hasn't suffered.  (that's a joke!)

• Relationships: being diagnosed is fascinating insofar as you can blame everything good and bad on PD. The nature of the disease has given me better clarity on those individuals that I want in my life and those that I do not. I have met some amazing people during this time of personal growth and, although it may seem counter-intuitive, I am thankful to PD for bringing these new individuals into my life.

• Empathy: not all change is bad. I have gone from being a selfish, work-obsessed lunatic to a becoming selfish, work-obsessed lunatic who wants to support his employees emotionally, not just financially. I now understand that everyone deals with a significant challenge---mine just happens to be PD.

Roberts Hosting Park Tank

What hasn't changed?

• My core values are still very much in tact. I want to work hard, keep a sense of humor, and strive to better my life and those of my loved ones.

• I am also still annoyingly optimistic. I believe that better days are ahead for me---I am actually unwavering in that belief. Other things I believe despite having little to no concrete evidence:

1. The Mets may actually make the playoffs next year. (insert voice of an elderly Jewish man from Queens) "Can you believe those arms! Pitching wins games!?!"
2. The new drug therapies in the pipeline will be game changers.
3. The most popular major at Syracuse University: Snow Shoveling Studies
4. My daughter will view PD like Polio--a relic of a previous age

• My passions remain: I still find joy in politics, reading, UConn (Basketball Capital of the World!), and watching my daughter insult strangers at Wegman's.

• I am still a social animal. I love talking to and meeting people and I hope that I always keep that trait.

So, where are we now? I no longer look at my diagnosis as, "why me?" but instead as, "who better than me?" I'm tougher, smarter, and more determined than this disease and I don't play to lose.